We are proud to introduce "Cut to the Quick," a biweekly column, exclusive to The S&Blog, written by Leigh Kunkel '09.Confessions of a Grammar-phile
I'll be the first to admit it: I'm a grammar-phile. It drives me crazy when people substitute "your" for "you're," or put apostrophes after everything, or overuse the semicolon. This isn't to say I've never sinned. I once wrote an entire paper putting an apostrophe after the word "theirs." However, there is nothing worse than the abuse-or use at all-of the exclamation point.
The exclamation point is, possibly, the most unnecessary grammatical mark ever invented. I suppose that technically it serves a purpose, (that being the indication of excitement) but any sort of decent writer should be able to select words that convey the same level of enthusiasm without the use of that awful thing.
Whereas the exclamation point was once used sparingly, and usually only to indicate great distress or urgency, it has become the grammatical equivalent of Tara Reid: completely overexposed. Take, for example, this actual conversation I have copied from a friend’s recent online chat:
Girl #1: THANKS FOR BEIN SUCH A SPORT AND TAKING THE SMALL ROOM!!! LOVE YA AND U CAN SLEEP IN MY BIG BED ANY TIME INSTEAD OF UR CRIB!!!
Girl #2: someone was a huge facebook whore recently...
Girl #1: yeah well thats what lots of free time will do to u since i haven’t seen u all week!!!!!!!!!!! by the way love the pic!! haha i am putting mine up soon as i get my laptop backkkkk omggg
No, I did not make that up. Even ignoring the all caps, the spelling errors, and the use of "u" instead of "you," those exclamation points weren't necessary. Girl #1 could have expressed herself just as well without these things. For example:
Girl #1: Thanks for being such a sport and taking the smaller room. I really appreciate it. I love you so much, and of course you can sleep in my big bed any time instead of your tiny crib.
Girl #2: You've been spending way too much time online lately.
Girl #1: Well, that’s what happens when you have so much free time. I can't believe I haven’t seen you all week. I love your pictures, by the way. I'll put mine up as soon as I get my laptop back.
Now, the second version may not have the same kind of maniacal enthusiasm, but the message gets across. An exclamation point is a crutch. People use it when they aren’t confident that what they've written will suffice. Exclamation marks indicate a lack of confidence on behalf of the writer, which is the last thing you want to do when you’re trying to make a point.
Exclamation points, therefore, should never, ever be used in formal writing. Even in casual writing, like e-mails, the exclamation point should still be used sparingly. When I read something like the passage above, all I can think about is that I'd gladly accept any punishment I received for duct-taping those girls' mouths shut rather than listen to them talk.
I don't pretend to have never used an exclamation point. I have. But I've never felt good about it in the morning.
10 comments:
I love you're column!
i'm no grammar fiend, but internet shorthand like "omg" and "lol" drive me crazy!
Speaking as an easily-excited person, I am personally offended by your anti-exclamation point stance! Please stop being such a grammar bigot! I look forward to a day in which all punctuation marks can be embraced equally! Don't you?!
The previous commenter obviously eats, shoots, and leaves. Nice piece.
All right, listen. I respect your point of view. I do, I really do. I just don't agree with it any more than I agree with Bush's foreign policy. Your argument comes from a prescriptive grammarian's point of view. I, on the other hand, believe in descriptive grammar (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grammar). Language evolves and changes, as do our writings systems along with it. It is like any other form of evolution in that it has no plan for the future-it just changes.
Having established this, let me say that every context that language is used in is different, and every context calls for a different set of rules that dictate how we speak and write. I imagine that you would address your professor differently than you would your little sibling. This is a point I believe you have glossed over. The quotes you used in your article were taken from AIM. There is a large difference between writing to a friend on AIM, and writing a class paper. I for one would never write in a class paper, "OMG, wtf is up with colonial power these days?!?!" Even still, I might type that in AIM while talking to a friend. That brings me to the exclamation point, which is the crux of this dilemma. The use of punctuation, like all aspects of language, is evolving. This evolution is most noticeable and rapid in the world of instant messaging. Maybe one day the exclamation point was used sparingly, but now its use has changed. It belongs to a certain group of AIM users who emulate speech as much as possible through their typing, and the exclamation point is an important tool for that emulation.
So next time let your friend write you saying "Hey, I have missed you so much!!!!!!!!" Instead of forcing them to painfully drone out "I have recently experienced great feelings of loss and desperation without you near me." It is AIM, not a final exam for English!
I concur.
Hyperbole. Sarcasm. Okay?
I used to be an AIM addict, but lately I've been avoiding it simply because the conversations seem so forced online. You're not actually talking to a person -- it's more like a verbal ping pong match while doing several other things at once. I think the whole punctuation issue is a symptom of this problem. People need the shorthands, superlative statements, and exclamation points to fool themselves into believing that they are saying something meaningful.
I agree! Although, I think that you shouldn't be too hard with people talking on instant messaging! The key there, of course, is speed of delivery! Thus, we don't get to pause and think of witty ways to express our exclamation!
rotflmfao!
lol!
lylas!
i <3 u,
k a t y h a r r i s!!!
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